This is what happens if you have time and you think your creative...

sigh..


Miss those times with him and the rest of the gang (ex agapean boys) hahaha...

faster come back la you all!!

Miss them more than ever...

the hanging out sessions
the impromptu singing sessions
the boy girl talk sessions
of course the insult (joking) sessions

time for a new adventure, Des?

Love sees colors, but It does not divide them.
Love mingles with races, but It is not bias.
Love is the only thing that is keeping us going, isn't?

Love for friends,
Love for family,
Love for her...

Love isn't love till happens.

thanks for loving me... (you know yourselves ;P)

Of all words to use, compose or to cook up a romantic verse..
the simplest but the most meaningful is this,
I love You..

Thanks for loving me, Seven...

yes.. i am rambling....


too many masks and too many acts I've seen lately...


How can "you" can be so fake knowing yourself that you are acting fake?


Love covers a multitude of sins, but definitely not "fake"ness...









There won't be any real changes unless you change to be real. Period.

[It's coming]

D' day...

D' day of which all of us strive and work together to make that day happen...
D' day of which all of us want to achieve for the One that we love and gave it all for us...
D' day of all of our pain staking plannings and re-plannings will come to an end...
D' day of all who are willing to answer the calling that has been engraved in their heart...
D' day of revealing who's for us and against us...
D' day of all our tears shed will turn to tears of joy...



What are we doing now, to make that Day happen?
It's not my, his, or her event..
It's ours...



Time to use the word "family" more than just grammar.


Time to use the word "faith" as an active verb, not passive adjective.







How about you? Is this just for show or real concern?
It's coming...

"Heaven rejoices even if one soul decides to come back to family that they've forsaken or never knew" -[ Andy ]

Tired...

I came across to a lot of people's blog, conversations and smses lately, and all of or rather most of them, talk about how busy and hectic their lives are, at the moment, all about Christmas Nite. Some are uplifting comments and some are just plain complains (not that I am saying that it's wrong or what, everyone are entitled to their opinions after all).


The thing that I sometimes find it very hard to deal is that most people think that I am very much free and just hanging around for fun. They say that they're tired of the tasks that given to them (i agree, its kinda tough) and everyone talks that their coursework is due and that they're not prepared and all. That's when...

I'm Tired of hearing people saying that the things they do, taken most of their time from course work.

I'm Tired of hearing people say that they spending too much time on this.


I'm Tired too...


I have to support myself financially for the rest of my academic year (which is 3 years to come), pay all my fees (for those who dunno!) and study and plus pass up my own coursework!
oh yeah don forget, oversee the whole christmas nite... I am almost in every dept, giving ideas and just being there.. how bout me??

I am more tired!
I am more tired of a people saying "You idiot!" talking as though i dunno anything, plus making me look stupid in front of people... respect a bit lah!!! come on lah! there's limit to everything!!!


Yet i press on, fighting the good fight....



I really tired.. and by the sound of this post, emotional! yes, i am very much emotional..









Those who are offended by this post, i am sorry but this is just my outpouring...

Word Cluster...

what does your word cloud look like? world clouds are simply clusters of frequently used words in your blog for example, pieced together to form this:

try this at : word

[ untitled ]

"Meeting you was fate,
becoming your friend was a choice,
falling in love with you was
beyond my control!"

[That You may know]

Falling far from your grace,
Waiting for your warm embrace,
This world seems alien to me
Won't You welcome me home?

Caught up in the dice of the world,
In my ways, I falter away,
You and I are worlds apart,
But still God, You're holding onto me

Love brought you here,
to die on that cross
and erase my sins away

Now I am clean
clean in your blood
clean in your presence

Now I'm singing to You
You're embrace so warm to me
I feel alive in your hand
Now, I welcomed home

"For by grace you have been saved through faith,
and that not of yourselves; it is the gift of God, not of works"
[Ephesians 2:8-9]

"We are saved by God's mercy, not by our own merits
By Christ's dying, not by our doing"

-Our Daily Bread-
30th Sept 08
That You may know

[Amen]

Enough being pros in talking bad about people, enough of complaining about how he sucked in inter-personal, intra-personal and definitely mass communication with the world, enough of thinking we're perfects and they're not...

Enough is the word... stop bitching.. let's start a revolution.. try saving the environment for change! or save a whale or something! it takes the same effort as bitching bout ppl here and there and even take the extra mile of spreading the message of hate..

We're ambassadors of Love...
for crying out Loud!

[Dr.Love]

You love simply because you cannot help it and once in awhile, right in the middle of an ordinary life, Love gives us a fairy tale. I agree and only love that let's us see normal things in an extraordinary way. The question is do you?

You don't love a man because he's perfect,
He is perfect because you love him.

Because I'm not perfect and will never be..
so stop trying to change me
I am what i am...
and I enjoying it to the max...

"Seduce my mind and you can have my body,
Find my soul and I'm yours forever"

[ Run andy, run ]

"I believe God made me for a purpose, but he also made me fast. And when I run,I feel His pleasure."

- Eric Liddell, Flying Scotsman

He made me fast too...
[ in floorball ]

[Randomness]

"To alter is God, to falter is man"

[andy]

thanks...

Just wanna say thanks to all my friends who took all the efforts to put a smile in my face..
honestly.. i also dunno why you,my friends, love me?
i'll stop pushing them away..



randomness pic:

andy and his green bike (or at least that's what he thinks)

Worst day ever?

6 a.m.
The clock is ringing
I need to spend an hour snoozing
'Cause I don't think I'm gonna make it

I punch in
I'm still sleeping
Watch the clock,
But it's not moving
'Cause every day is never ending
I need to work I'm always spending

And I feel like
I'm living the worst day
Over and over again
And I feel like the summer is leaving again
I feel like
I'm living the worst day
I feel like you're gone
And every day is the worst day ever

Yesterday was the worst day ever
And tomorrow won't be better
It's history repeating (on and on)
Summer plans are gone forever
I traded them in for dishpan water
And every day is never ending
I need to work I'm always spending

it's so long
I can't go on
it's so long
I can't go on

[simple plan]

Within the darkness,
You are the light that shines a way

[20th b'day]

It's my birthday...
and I'm bored...

nothing special happened today..
guess i'll just lay low and chill.....

[i used to be happening..]

my birthday is coming soon...

[ I can't bear to see the man I've been, rising up in me again..]

and I'm not excited at all...
don't want any celebrations..
i've caused too much pain and hurt..

[Why so serious?]

Why so serious?
was his corny line,
said by a joker,
who lost his mind.

A playboy by day,
A symbol by night,
two sides of the same coin
can't make up his mind

They have the same fame,
altered to make a change
One fights for himself
One fights for the other
Who is to be blamed?

[inspired during english class today, copyrights reserved]

the meaning is up to your interpretation skills... what do you see?

"There are some who are fools by nature and
There's some who are fools by choice"

[I'm a fool by choice]

[Break 'Em]

Don't tell what I can't do and who I can't be...

Christ : Impossible is Nothing

[Upcoming Event]

that's how slow is the internet connection here.. sigh..

For things to

change,

I MUST
CHANGE FIRST

Letting It go,finally..

"Faith is all I need

- holding on to Christ."
[quoted from Colin G.]

[Waited]

“We can only appreciate the miracle of a sunrise if we have waited in the darkness”



Hey there, I'm sorry for the things that I've said. Looking back, I find that it has no relevance or whatsoever importance. I'm sorry for being so ignorant and plain idiot till I let you pass me by. Please come back to me and please can't we be like how we used to be? I'm trying my best to change and I've changed.. okay, I know we can't go back and we should not dwell in the past but we can make a better future, a new beginning, all you gotta do is.. Trust me..

for one more time...I know it's something hard.. but I'll wait.. I'm still waiting.. I missed you and I still do, Daisy.

P.s. I love you

(I never publicly said this except to you in person and that's how i felt and still do.. )







[I've waited in the darkness... I am still waiting in the dark]
(shed some light and you will discover my words)

There is one pain,

I often feel, which you will never know.

It's caused by the absence of you.

I have not lived . Until I've found someone . Worth dying for

[Still waiting for her...]

[Thinking About You]

I'm thinking of the special things
that make me love you so -
Your special smile,
Your thoughtful ways,
The kindness that You show,

I'm thinking how You make my world
and everything seem fine..

I don't want to possess You,
or change You,
I only want to hold you,
and touch You and,
look into Your eyes,
and tell You that I care,
with all of my heart.

Have a nice day...

"The God I believe in, is a God of second chances"

but sadly most of His Children do not follow in His steps, I wonder which word suits them better,

Hypocrisy or Pharisee?

They often forget to include the thought that they were once sinners saved by grace, before passing the conclusion that others don't deserve a second chance..

Know who your real friends are...

p.s : andy, take note, don't be like them (don wanna be like them anyway) and try your utmost effort to be that very person He wants you to be and In His steps, you shall follow....

for you, i will...

[Sorry]

I'm sorry for hurting you
I'm sorry for making you cry
I'm sorry i didnt realise why
I'm sorry for not understanding you new right
I'm sorry for all those fights
I'm sorry for not listening
I'm sorry for not trying
I'm sorry i failed you
I'm sorry i didnt try
I'm sorry i really am
I'm sorry for fading away
I'm sorry you swayed away
I'm sorry it was too late
I'm sorry i tried again
I'm sorry i cried all night
I'm sorry i never found you
I'm sorry your hearts lost
I'm sorry i couldnt cure it
I'm sorry but i'll try now
I'm sorry if its too late
I'm sorry but i have to try
I'm sorry for all the things that i just flew by
I'm sorry for being so mad
I'm sorry for being so down
sorry for missing you out the puzzle
sorry i let you fall that time
I'm sorry for my swaying emotions
I'm sorry for losing your heart
I'm sorry i wish things where ok
I'm sorry for being an idiot
I'd do anything to make you happy if u just trust me

[You]

I loved you more than I have ever known
Those starry eyes
Those tender lips
You made my heart melt
Then boil into a roaring fire
I now know
What my eyes could not see
You are the only one that is for me
Many nights those tears flew
Being myself without anyone
Anyone to care about the thoughts
Looking at the sky and knowing
Many mistakes I had
Many mistakes I have had

[Hibernate mode]

hey there.. This blog has been set to hibernate mode till further notices.. dunno when it will awake.. till then, signing out andyfeelings...

[Company sports]

In a typical Malaysian company, the general staff likes to discuss or play football after work. For the middle management, it is tennis. For the top management, it is nothing else but golf, golf and golf.

So what is the conclusion? The higher you are in the management, the smaller your balls.

Are yours Big or small?

Mine is on fire :)

If I had a twin, It'll be like this...

Two guys are sitting at either end of Zouk's bar late one night when one of them looks up and says to the other,"How's it going'?You from around here?"

The other guy says," Klang."

"Wow, me too! Where did you go to school?"

"Klang High School."

"Hey, so did I!"

"What year did you leave school?"

"2005"

"We're the same age!"

"What street do you live on?"

"Jalan Pending 7"

"What a co-incidence!!"

"What did your old man do for a living?"

"He's a retired electrician."

"Unreal! Mine too!"

Just then, a waiter comes in and asks to the bartender, "What's going on?"

The bartender replies, " Not much... but the Ravin twins are drunk again!"

A "Karipap" head & a Spike head

[Old Times]

This is taken after I was robbed in Tbr few months ago, if I'm not mistaken.. Well, I can only say that whatever bad or worse experience we have or had, God will bring good out of it.. Well, the bad news is i lost my handphone and my ego was bruised but the good news is we came up with the video.. haha..

[Imperfect]

Quit griping about your Christian Fellowship;
If it was perfect, you couldn't belong.

Taking it back

I take back of all the things I've said and done earlier this period of my life.. I have focusing too much on something which was not there after all.. I just need to let go..

Sometimes, what makes us strong is not holding on, but letting it go..

I'm letting go..

sorry friend.. you were there.. just that i was too caught up in things that i realize it has no longer a hold over me..

no point holding grudge and the pain.. time to let go..

I should.. let go..

I'm sorry, Gerard, Deswyn and Alice..

I'm sorry, whomever I've hurt..

I'm sorry, Daisy

[Alone]

here i am, left alone.. though I have a lot of friends to laugh with, but it seems there's no one to cry with.. I feel so tired of telling people on how i feel but none understands, not even you.. no one there, to defend me or even try to wear my heavy laden shoes now..

Its all a misunderstanding,they say easily without even trying to listen what i'm trying to say..

Friend.. where are you?

please try to understand.. be my shield..

Are we thankful?


Think twice before waste anything.. or even ramble about what we don't have.. that new motorola phone that we always wanted, a new shirt, a raise in our allowance..

think twice before we spend..

We don't fully appreciate what we have, till we lost them.. that is often how we learn to be thankful, unfortunately...

Untitled

For all sad words of tongue and pen, the saddest are these, 'It might have been.'

[Four letter word]

I'm sorry for speaking, than keeping silence..

As vulnerable as i can be, i lay down my defense..
You caught me off guard and here i am..

please stop breaking my heart, there's nothing left to be broken anymore.. let me pick it up please..

The worst solitude is to be destitute of sincere friendship.

[Sir Francis Bacon]

[Use me]

All who have been using me, are welcome to come and use again me.. use me as how i've been used.. I've had enough of these..

Stop living in denial and come..







Use me...

[Lagu Emo Ku]

Apakah dayaku?
Tuk' membuat mu mengerti,
Ku bukan sekadar memori,
yang kini kian menghilang

Apakah cintamu?
Ibarat api-api,
Berkelipan di nun langit,
Ku tak terdaya,
mencapai mu lagi

Selamat tinggal Julieku,
Semoga mu senyum selalu,
Ku hanya bisa muja mu dari sisi gelapku,
tak terdaya ku mendekati mu,
Semuanya berakhir malam ini..


I was just wandering around today at college hall and sat down.. I was waiting for my groupmates to have a discussion on our assignment.. Apparently they were late and so.. started to scribble some words down.. and surprisingly, It's in Bahasa Malaysia and some Indon words added.. hehe..

who's Julie? well, it actually my direct translation of my Juliette.. you know, from Romeo and Juliette stuff.. Well, here i'm talking bout her..

And again.. here i am.. waiting for someone to compose melody and music for this words of mine.. I really wish I have singing ability and playing guitar pro skills like Gerard and Deswyn, Kush or Jon woo.. anyone.. I really wish.. so that i don have to ask others to do it for me.. i have no idea whether they might thought that this fella has nothing better to do and always want us to compose.. but that's the fact, i can't.. but that's for now..

Somehow I feel God a bit bias.. there's alot ppl of there who don't appreciate their talents.. how i wish i have theirs.. haha.. anyway.. that's all..

Selamat tinggal

[lost?]

forsaken,forgotten,
left in the dark
to figure out if
the light will shine again...
Life has never been the same again..
Emptiness clouds my heart
and it feels nothing...

Are you there?
Are you for real?
where are your arms?
I can feel them no more..
Where are your whispers?
I can hear them no more

It's like the rain is pouring when the sun is shining
It's like standing on shifting sand
and i'm sinking deeper and deeper..

Standing at the crossroad,
looking at the signs,
just to realize that i am lost..

When will I realize?
when will I see?
past the smiles ,
that hides the pain inside
that only You can take it away..

Letting it go[?]

One thing that had been hard for me (and it still is), is to let go.. I find it trivial as how others can just easily let go of anything and just live on.. Maybe they're strong or maybe i'm just weak.. I see myself as someone who really treasures everything or at least something that has happened in my life which left a huge impact, be it negatively or positively..

The decision to let go is not that hard actually. I can decide to let go but its the matter of am I willing to let go and want to let it go? Having a bit, actually quite a lot of mixed feelings of trying to let something that is so precious for me but the only way i see of making things better is to put this matter to rest and move on but i can't.. well after giving much thought actually i can, i realized that i don't want to let go.. I feel like i'm contradicting myself.. a part of me say's let go and cling on to God's perfect timing and another part of me say's don't.. what if things can get better if it stays the same.. yup.. uncertainty tries to play a major role in my life right now but i'm trying my best, not to let it but then again.. i am weak, i guess.. i know it won't last..

Times like these, I am thankful, I got God on my side.. i know i should be thankful on every occasions.. well, i'm trying to.. well, that's for now la.. till then, write or rather type again some time later.. haha..

oh y, people asked why post tonnes of personal stuff on blog.. 'you want every one to know ar?' and ' i thought its personal wan?' well, for me.. i get the peace when i just express everything on my mind and look back on what i went through.. Diary will be good but i prefer this alternative.. haha.. anyway enjoy your week days ahead guys and girls..

[Remember?]

days before Freshmen Night
You were preparing and,
I gave a helping hand
Cutting flyers all day,
Was all that happened,
That's when I saw,
You for you...

Your heart was beating fast,
You couldn't fall asleep,
how i wish i could hold you,
and as i saw you to sleep,
I watched the night pass me by,
And that's when i know
You're for me...

remember when we talked outside hostel,
hours and hours just passes us by,
remember when you almost broke down,
and i was there to pick you up,
all the while you did the same too
remember when we were apart,
life doesn't feels so right
oh i remember.. i remember..

the way you smile and
the way you brush your hair
oh i can't forget itall the time we had,
i wish i can tell all
all the small things
that you did and said
how i cherish them really

maybe you didn't know
maybe you didn't see
all these i saw of you
one thing i want you to know
if these songs were to fade away
remember the time we spent together
I'll hold it right here forever

remember when i lost myself,
you were there to search,
remember when i hold your hand
that kept me warm that cold night,
remember when you needed space
i was dumbfounded and
didn't know what to do and
remember when i sent those smses,
it gave you tears and hurts
remember when I said sorry
told you that it was history
all i say is sorry
and it feels like it's not enough
till you say it's okay
won't you come and say

we're on a ride to nowhere
and it doesn't matter
as long as you there
nowhere is somewhere
you asked me where i want us to go,
i say it now anywhere or nowhere
as long as you there

[above is the some lyrics that i came up, not that great but that's how i felt, the 1st and 3rd is not in the song coz its too long, hope you'll like it]

Random Quotes...

It's has been a long time since i've post something or anything..haha.. no internet la, sorry ya.. anyway i was just surfing the Net and came across some quotes from the movies that i've watched and oh boy, it stirred a lot of memories that i really cherished.. so, here's some,

Lt. Col. Jimmy Doolittle: There's nothing stronger than the heart of a volunteer.

(now,this sentence is really something, it's rings true actually... A project or a work or anything can be done with sheer hardwork but it's actually like one man show.. Not many really like or agree with what we want to do,so somehow they are forced indirectly to like it or do it, as i see it, it won't last long actually.. I pray that when I'm about to do anything, i'll have a bunch of pals that shares the same passion, the fire and able to be there for each other when we're about to do something.. we will volunteer ourselves to support whatever each other's undertakings. And truth to be told, nobody likes to be forced right...There's nothing stronger than the heart of a volunteer, now that is something that last long...)

Lt. Col. Jimmy Doolittle: You know what top secret is?

Rafe: Yes, sir. It's the kind of mission where you get medals, but they send 'em to your relatives.

Pelabuhan Mutiara

Bandar Bidadari

Seth: I'd rather have one breath of her hair, one kiss of her mouth, one touch of her hand than an eternity without it. One. (this reminds me of her)

Seth: You're a good doctor, I can feel it

Maggie: That's pretty flimsy proof.

Seth: Close your eyes... what am I doing?

Maggie: You're touching me.

Seth: How do you know?

Maggie: I can feel it.

Seth: You should learn to use that more often.

(oh man, that's a very good pick up line indeed)

Maggie: When they ask me what I liked best, I'll say it was you. (same here, girl.. hehe)

Maximus: I knew a man who once said, 'Death smiles at us all. All a man can do is smile back.

Maximus: What we do in life echoes in eternity

(What we sow is what we reap,amen)

well, that's it i guess.. got a lot but then the post will get longer and longer and by then maybe it would get the Guiness records for the longest post of quotes.. anyway will post something later i think since i am in CIT lab.. for once the internet is not that laggy and i might end up liking CIT.. i know it unbelievable but then again miracles do happen right.. haha.. i thought i will never say this but CIT lab rocks, for now..

Random thoughts...

"Mama always said life was like a box a chocolates, never know what you're gonna get."
Tom Hanks (Forrest Gump) in Forrest Gump(1994)

- oh man, i can watch this movie again and again and won't get bored of it.. just randomly went online and saw this quote.. brought memories of this movie.. hmm..life is like a box of chocolates, bitter and sweet the same time.. one can only wait and taste for himself/herself.. what is in store for me? one can only wonder..