One thing that had been hard for me (and it still is), is to let go.. I find it trivial as how others can just easily let go of anything and just live on.. Maybe they're strong or maybe i'm just weak.. I see myself as someone who really treasures everything or at least something that has happened in my life which left a huge impact, be it negatively or positively..
The decision to let go is not that hard actually. I can decide to let go but its the matter of am I willing to let go and want to let it go? Having a bit, actually quite a lot of mixed feelings of trying to let something that is so precious for me but the only way i see of making things better is to put this matter to rest and move on but i can't.. well after giving much thought actually i can, i realized that i don't want to let go.. I feel like i'm contradicting myself.. a part of me say's let go and cling on to God's perfect timing and another part of me say's don't.. what if things can get better if it stays the same.. yup.. uncertainty tries to play a major role in my life right now but i'm trying my best, not to let it but then again.. i am weak, i guess.. i know it won't last..
Times like these, I am thankful, I got God on my side.. i know i should be thankful on every occasions.. well, i'm trying to.. well, that's for now la.. till then, write or rather type again some time later.. haha..
oh y, people asked why post tonnes of personal stuff on blog.. 'you want every one to know ar?' and ' i thought its personal wan?' well, for me.. i get the peace when i just express everything on my mind and look back on what i went through.. Diary will be good but i prefer this alternative.. haha.. anyway enjoy your week days ahead guys and girls..
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